put me right.

she stares silently at the screen, the blinking cursor taunting her like a well-worn enemy. her words, timid and unsure, seem to prove the thoughts she avoids - no one listens because no one likes the mess.

she almost listens. her backspace key knows the touch of her hesitant finger. but this time? this time she pushes through despite the fear.

she waits for the words.

she waits because she knows they will come.

slowly, surely, they peek around the corner and squint from the light.

Your love broke me and put me right

she knows this to be true. her heart still feels the tender pull of deep-cleaning's scars and she's learned to anticipate the sudden rush of memory. she thinks of the past few months - the tears and the heavy-inked pages lined with her questions of why. she knows she may never understand.

just like she knows He will always offer His hand.

the words come easier now, her story always just below the surface but never willing for show-and-tell. it takes some prodding - some reminders of Who the story truly belongs to and whispers of protection always help. it's what she loves, what she's always relied on, these words. friends from long ago who first knew the lack of self worth and the questions of love.

Your love broke me and put me right

yes. she knows this now. she knows she'll never forget the day she breathed deep and faced the past in the arms of One who held her hand. the rushing of disbelief and the clawing of memory came swift and unexpected. but in the end, His love won the fight. picking her up from the ground - broken and bloody - He began the work of a surgeon's hand.

mending re-breaking cleansing healing

she still stares at the screen. the cursor doesn't seem as much of an enemy now. slowly, she's understanding that these words are not her own but His. slowly, she's allowing herself the moment of rest before jumping in - His storytelling is always so much better than her own anyways.

 

 

Posted on March 30, 2011 .