truth: right now.

well goodness. i just wrote a non-communicative post and would have haphazardly hit publish had it not been for this poetry by my friend rain. it opened up something inside, put words to some feelings i've been battling lately. i don't even know if i'll be able to accurately describe where it is my heart has settled these past few weeks, but i'm going to try. i need to try.

here is the truth: right now i'm floating.

i'm not sure what's caused the halting of progress. yesterday my therapist mentioned we all experience plateaus in our pursuit of healing - and maybe this is what i'm feeling.

but it doesn't feel like a leveling out...not at all. maybe it's not a halting of progress but a preparation for a new beginning.

it feels like something's building - that tension of an awakening.

perhaps i've been resting on a plateau. finding strength in others who know themselves well and can come alongside my own questions. i feel an unsettling - a movement toward something - and i want to turn and run.

but i know my heart won't let me.

and here is the Truth: right now the adventure's calling. 

and soon, i won't be able to float on the arms of others anymore. i'll need to step out on my own, and claim my story.

in jeremiah, he speaks of the Truth being a fire shut up in his bones. this is what i feel. and just like the prophet, i'm weary of holding it in and i know i can't - i'm just waiting for Grace to catch me, really.

until then, i'll burn and the words will grow hot.


what is your truth and what do you know to be True? where do you find your heart resting today?

Posted on December 21, 2011 .