the story is happening.

free yourself and leave ripples - sabrina ward harrison

i believe Someone wants to stir our hearts to big things so we can learn to rely on this Source and fall in stride with it. i believe we are most complete when we are chasing those dreams, because in those times we are actually chasing the very heart of God, sometimes without even knowing it - mandy steward

last week, i took a personality test. part of my inner-workings include focus on dreaming and the future. in other words, dreaming is second nature to me. but where do you stop dreaming and when do you begin doing?

i sat in the coffee shop for a few hours this week thinking about this question. with a book coming out {hopefully} within the next few months, it's pretty easy to assume i've taken the steps necessary to follow my dreams.

this isn't true.

and i think this is where mandy starts talking about the breaking down of dreams - the realization of what your true dreams are once another dream falls apart or fails to meet expectations.

so i asked myself some hard questions this week. am i letting the story happen to me? am i willing to even step on the stones leading to my dream? with shaky fingers, i wrote out the brick walls surrounding me:

  • 50 hour work week
  • demanding schedule
  • exhaustion
  • no time
  • plate just too full

i thought again of my INFP - the intuitive force inside that i fail to rely on - and i began to wonder what if? and why not? 

so many times, i've stopped short of those ripples made by freeing oneself. i've mistaken my dream as selfish and what would others do or think? and slowly, i'm starting to just not care. i'm realizing the support system given to me can handle the ripples and may even welcome them. 

i stared at the numbers scribbled in my journal - numbers putting us closer than ever before to me staying home. numbers that equaled hope and adventure and spoke of discipline and temptation...

i think of the messy middle - the disorganized chaos left behind in the wake of a decision weighted with a dream. in a lot of ways, i imagine these past few years have pushed me to this point where the decision rests in my hands alone. this is where i realize i've been stepping on the stones without even seeing them.

i've been chasing His heart without even knowing it.

what did this section stir within you? where do you find yourself? 


next week we'll focus on the marginal excuse mandy talks about in the eBook {first part of Part 2}

Posted on February 7, 2012 and filed under tomorrow's dreams.