I've been kicking an idea around recently. It alternately exhilarates and terrifies me. I meet with friends and lob the idea into conversation. “Am I crazy for thinking this?” I ask, my eyes slightly bugged out. Because it's a little insane to add another project to my plate.
Could I? Should I? Dare I?
I seek both permission to follow through and to back away slowly. I'm not sure whether this is the right path or Resistance at its worst: masquerading as a Good Idea.
I have a sneaking suspicion this is a foregone conclusion. If the idea didn't intrigue me, I wouldn't ask the question. If it didn't terrify me, I wouldn't ask the question either.
My leaps of faith in recent years included moving out of state and quitting my job to better pursue writing. Those situations began in similar fashion. An idea sprouted. I promptly dismissed it. The idea pestered me. Excitement loomed over the prospect. Then I'd rationalize why I shouldn't. Back and forth. Until, finally, I took the leap.
There are no guarantees. But these days, I worry less about the “what ifs” than the possibility of failing. The road less traveled by is never boring, that's for sure.
In this case, I've moved on from telling a few select friends to telling trusted advisers. These people know me and my abilities. And they are excited about this idea. The words barely tumble out of my mouth before they exclaim, “do it!” And then they problem solve and make suggestions and before I know it, I'm agreeing with them.
I should do it. For such a time as this. Because if not me, then who?
Of course, it's not as simple as deciding to move forward. Adjustments will need to be made. Sometimes saying yes to one thing means saying no to something else or at least amending priorities.
This is the dreaming stage. I'm taking time to brainstorm and outline and ponder. I'm imagining how I will work on it and what shape it will take. I'm considering just how this particular leap of faith will feel.
You know what?
It feels pretty dang good. Adventure awaits.
BIO :: Leigh Kramer is a Midwestern transplant living in Nashville. She writes about life in the South, what God has been teaching her, and her ongoing quest for the perfect fried pickle. A former medical social worker, she recently fulfilled a childhood dream by writing her first novel. You can follow her adventures on Twitter and her blog HopefulLeigh.